The Story of Another Survivor

The Story of Another Survivor - Ted Talk

Emma Murphy isn't an example of teen dating abuse, but she is a survivor of domestic violence-- and her story tells so much of speaking up against abuse. That's why I want to share it.

I've talked before in one of my first blog posts, Grow Flowers Raise Voices, but it's about time to talk about it again. As Murphy says in her video, "We all know of somebody who has been through domestic violence," and that makes talking about it all the more important. People who are going through this need to hear a voice of encouragement, to know things get better, and to know it is time to leave their abuser behind.

So once again, I want to call out to any other survivors to raise your voices with me. Our stories can make a difference-- and I have seen the results. We have the power behind us, to help those are still victims and to make those around us aware so they'll see the signs before falling into an abusive relationship. Remember: the first step to prevention is awareness. The only way people will know is if we stand together and make ourselves known. And to any victims, anyone who is recovering, you are not alone. A community of support is out there, and things will get better.

This coming Saturday is my pageant, another chance to spread the word about dating abuse to a diverse audience of college students-- and whoever else is in the crowd. I may not be able to say much in a minute on stage, but even a few words can make a change. And who knows-- if I'm able to move forward, I'll have more opportunity to get out in the community! Keep me in your prayers in this coming week, it's going to be busy!

If you know any organization (scouts, church, etc.) that would like to have me speak on Teen Dating Abuse, please contact me through my website here with your email address. To keep up with updates on this blog please feel free to hit the subscribe button in the top right corner to be alerted to new posts every Monday. Have something you would like to know more about in the future? Leave a comment and I'll do my best to answer right away! Remember, the first step in solving the problem of teen dating abuse is awareness!

Comments

What is Traumatic Bonding?

Many people outside of an abusive relationship often don't understand why a victim doesn't just leave. I have covered the topic of exactly why it isn't always as simple as breaking up-- or moving out in the case the victim is already living with their abuser-- in a former blog post ( click here! ) but today I really want to discuss in depth one of the lesser thought of factors. I mentioned in last week's post, What is the Cycle of Abuse, that the abuse cycle can bring on something known as 'traumatic bonding.' This is something most abuse victims, myself included, fall to unknowingly. In his book The Abusive Personality: Violence and Control in Intimate Relationships , Donald Dutton writes, "This process [traumatic bonding] is an attachment to the abuser formed by the prior power differential in the relationship coupled with intermittent abuse. The result is a powerful attachment bond that begins to operate on the abuse victim with time away from the a...

It's Time to Talk about Psychological and Verbal Abuse || TedTalk

Domestic violence is the leading cause of injury to women in the United States. Almost half of all men and women in the United States have been victim to psychological abuse in an intimate relationship. It doesn't matter who you are, domestic violence-- which is not always physical-- can happen to anyone . Today, I wanted to share Lizzie Glazer's TedTalk. While she mainly speaks about a situation within a marriage, this information is relevant for any intimate, or even familial, abuse. I urge you to take a few minutes to watch this video and learn about the effects of psychological and verbal abuse.

Speaking Out Against Abuse

With everything that has been happening within the world in this past year, I think this subject has come into the light of importance-- where it should be. Speaking out against abuse isn't easy . Some might wonder why a survivor of abuse wouldn't wish to name their abuser and see justice done, and there are quite a few reasons, some of which I have spoken about before. If the abuser is still in the picture, it can be dangerous. The survivor might fear retribution-- something I feared when I first began speaking about my experience within an abusive relationship given I was still in the same area of my abuser and saw him regularly. Even if the abuser isn't still in the survivor's life, they may not wish to approach the subject because it's a painful topic or because they're embarrassed by what they went through-- even though there is nothing for a survivor to feel embarrassed or ashamed of. This isn't me trying to make survivors feel bad about not speaking...

Speak Up. Stand Tall.

Search This Blog